Teen Mom: How to Blend In At Your Wedding (from 3/22)

Chelsea and Adam have now been broken up for a couple weeks. His car is parked in her driveway, junk is in the garage and he hasn't come to see Aubree or pay child support. She should sell his car and his stuff.

A letter comes from social services that says they will be serving Adam with a notice to appear in court because he hasn't paid child support since June 22nd. Chelsea doesn't know how this happened, she guesses they just automatically do this. Why hasn't she been taking care of this and aggresively pursuing it? I don't care of Randy takes care of all of her bills, Adam is the father. I HATE ADAM!

Chelsea and Randy are meeting for lunch AGAIN to catch up on her life so she drops Aubree off at her mom's house. She says studying for the GED test isn't going well because Aubree is distracting because she's soooo cute. How about you drop Aubree off at your mom's house so you can study for the GED instead of going to lunch for the 80th time this season.

Instead, Chelsea thinks it is a good idea to bring Aubree to a coffee shop with her so she can study there and let Aubree drink juice that doesn't look watered down (someone told me Randy is a dentist so why doesn't she know about all of the sugar??) 

Why isn't she studying while Aubree is sleeping or with her dad or mom or just playing at home quietly? Oh, because Chelsea is lazy as hell and she's just trying to look smart and not lazy by "reading" at a coffee shop. Notice she opened the GIANT book to page one? Guess she hasn't read anything yet.

Adam calls suddenly and wants to see Aubree tomorrow. He complains that he hasn't seen her in forever and that it is dumb that Chelsea has plans and he can't take her.  He just keeps getting better and better! He can just stay away and pretend that he doesn't have a daughter until it is convenient for him or he misses the cameras being around.

Thankfully Chelsea doesn't give in.

At home she decides to Facebook stalk him. There are some new photos and it looks like Adam is living with a new girlfriend who looks like a mix between a "bulldog and a mouse" who smokes butts.

Chelsea and her friend Megan go out to get pedicures instead of studying for her GED test.  For some reason the cameras are at Adam's place with his girlfriend (or I guess I should say HER place). In the Facebook pictures that Chelsea was looking at, the faces were blurred out, but here she is on TV. She has the "Rachel" hair cut. Seriously.

She says that it sucks that Chelsea won't let Adam see Aubree. Yeah and it sucks that Adam doesn't want to see her until he thinks it will impress a girl or get him on television. It sucks that Adam thinks he can choose when he can be a dad.  What is this girl doing with him? Oh yeah, getting on TV.

I wonder if Adam picked her up at the county fair.  Fair whore.

Chelsea calls Adam to tell him that she's not comfortable with him taking Aubree. He tells Chelsea that Aubree isn't hers, she's their child together.  Of course he wasn't saying this when he lived with Chelsea and she was doing everything for the baby and he played XBox or went out with friends. Clearly she was HER child then.

Also, during her 16 and Pregnant Episode he said he wanted to sign away all parental rights to her. Should've taken him up on that Chelsea. But since she's the human equivalent of a sloth that never happened.

Oh and Aubree is now drinking what can only be that gross orange drink from McDonald's.



Kailyn brings Isaac to Jo's parents' house and his brother Junior actually meets her at the front door instead of through the garage like he normally does. Must be a special occasion.

Suzi meets Kailyn for lunch to discuss that they need to get some custody agreement in writing.  Duh.

Kailyn goes to pick up Isaac from Jo's house and Jo doesn't even let her inside. Back at her mom's she calls the courthouse to get information about a custody agreement.

Her studying for school isn't working very well because she got an F on a test. She talks to her college friends outside during lunch about Isaac and Jo. It really does seem like these two friends are set up, maybe paid by MTV just so Kailyn isn't always talking to the camera, Jo, her mom or her side ponytail-skintight-shorts girl.

Kailyn drops a class in school because she feels she is doing too much with her other classes, work, Isaac and the custody situation.  She heads to the place to file the paperwork for custody. Suzi pays the money to get the forms started.



Leah and Corey are discussing their fight about the wedding. Well, Leah is discussing it. Corey is mumbling incoherently. They decide they do want to get married after all.

Today Corey and Leah are going to pick out their cake. There is a camoflauge cake and they say that their wedding IS in camo. Did she just say that??? Because I joked about that when they chose their location but if that's actually true...holy shit.

Leah and Corey go ice skating with some friends. It looks like Leah's been sharing her eyeliner because her friend is all raccooned up too.

Ali's second opinion appointment is today. These doctors seem much more friendly. I hope they can find out what is going on and that it is good news.

There are some growth restrictions in one of her hips. They suggest a geneticist as well. When Leah says how no doctor can tell if Ali will ever be able to walk, I feel sick to my stomach and sad.

Corey and his wedding party are trying on their suits. They really are camo accented. Oh...my...god.

Back at home Leah's eyeliner is at risk of smudging because she's tearing up a bit talking to Corey about Ali. I'm lucky that I do not have eyeliner on. And even if I did, there wouldn't be enough that it would come off with tears.




Jenelle is staying with Reefer at his cousin's house. Evidently Reefer can't drive because Jenelle is talking him through it from the passenger seat. He probably should've waited to smoke until after they drove.

Jenelle is taking a break from Reefer and she goes to her friend Amber's house. Amber has a blow up dolphin hanging from the ceiling.

Jenelle doesn't know if she should be honest with her mother about stealing her credit cards because then she might use it against her with the cops. But if she lies, her mom is going to start an investigation. Hmmm...I think the truth just MIGHT come out when the show airs.

Since Jenelle no longer has money to support Reefer, he's going to stay with friends two hours away. Well, she says it is because they are arguing a lot but we all know that he's really just taking a break while she's broke and plans to turn up again when she gets her Teen Mom money.

Jenelle goes to her mother's house and doesn't even look happy to see Jace, she doesn't pick him up.

Barbara shows Jenelle the $700 credit card bill that includes purchases and cash advances! Cash advances! Why didn't I think of that? That's how they bought their weed...uummm...gas and food.

Barbara wants her to pay her in one lump sum or she's going to file a police report. Jenelle refuses to do so because she doesn't even know how much it is. Seems simple you moron. Look at the dates. Look at the locations of the gas & food & cash advances.

After their argument she leaves without hugging, saying goodbye or even looking at Jace.

Jenelle gets her financial aid check reissued to her and it will take a week or so. She thinks she has lost her job because her boss has been calling her because she's missed a few days of work. Duh.  She explains that she's had a lot of family issues but didn't say why she didn't call him before missing work. Yup, she's fired.

Jenelle has no where to stay since Reefer isn't around and Amber isn't answering her phone. Maybe that blow up dolphin popped and she's out shopping for a new one.  So Jenelle is planning to sleep in her car. Barbara calls her and tells her she can come home for the night and they will talk in the morning.

The next morning while Jace is drinking something purple, Barbara and Jenelle talk about the situation. Every time either of them say "Kieffer" I get confused. I've been calling him Reefer for so long that I think that is REALLY his name. Barbara wishes Jenelle would stop seeing him and take responsiblity and go to school. We all know this isn't going to happen anytime soon thanks to US Weekly. I kind of think that the magazines shouldn't do articles about the girls while the show is on so we don't already know how things turn out after the season is done.


Next week is the season finale! To prepare, put on something that will allow you to blend into your couch so you can feel right at home at the camo wedding. Also, if you're doing anything illegal, stop and get rid of it because cops are involved next week!