They are discussing taking a trip with all the girls to Morocco. Everyone seems in except for Kelly. If you remember correctly she went a little crazy on her last trip with the ladies.
Another day, LuMann and Ramona are walking down the street and LuMann says that she likes that Ramona has her high heels on because at least she's as tall as she is. And then Ramona said she likes being at her level.
Am I missing something?
They sit down for tea and LuMann gets right to it. She thought Ramon's party was nice and the wine was good but it was too bad that Ramona had to cheapen it by having it out with Jill in front of her guests. She tells Ramona that she needs to be careful with what she says because she hurts people's feelings.
Ramona's response is one that I hate "At least I say it to people's faces and not behind their back." THIS DOESN'T MAKE IT OK TO BE A FUCKING BITCH! People use that excuse all the time "At least I'm honest." I'd rather you shut your mouth or lie than be honest if you're going to be an asshole. Being honest isn't an OK to hate on people.
Side note: LuMann is wearing some kind of Christmas decoration as a necklace.
Of course nothing is Ramona's fault and she has done nothing wrong. I hate Ramona more now than I ever have.
Sonja is having a photo shoot for her toaster oven cookbook that Kelly says hasn't even been written yet. She's on top of the dining room table in a gown with no underwear on and Kelly gets to see her vagina.
Cindy, Jill, Kelly and LuMann are going on a little trip to Canyon Ranch. Kelly tells them about Sonja flashing her vagina and she mentions that she's never seen another vagina except her own. What? Not even in a movie or anything? I've seen so many because I watched every birth I could possibly find on Youtube while I was pregnant.
When talking about relationships and how Kelly can't find a good man, she mentions that she's been slapped in the face by a man before. That's basically all that happens but the commercials made it sound like Kelly was going to reveal this big deep, dark secret. Not saying that it isn't a horrible thing to be slapped in the face, but the commercials were much more dramatic about it. We didn't even hear the story about it.
It takes 6 hours to get to the ranch. Cindy (who set up the trip) has gifts for the ladies, embroidered robes. LuMann says in interview "Of course Jill opens it up in the lobby as if nobody else is staying in the hotel...really darling, never open a gift in the middle of a hotel lobby." But isn't this LuMann's hand, holding her own robe?
This place is a spa and the girls do some kind of drumming class. They go around the room and say something about themselves that no one knows.
LuMann: "I like to wear large jewelry when I'm drumming." <---or eating. or walking. or talking. or breathing.
Kelly: "I have an obsession with smells." Now that I think about it, it does seem like she's always scrunching her nose up smelling something bad.
Jill: something about her hair not being naturally red.
Cindy: "I'm not as tough as I appear." This was the best answer yet because it was deeper than the other three. However, Jill thinks she should have told everyone that she has fake teeth.
At dinner menopause comes up and Cindy asked if they've seen "The Vagina Monocles". Obviously, we know it is the Vagina Monologues. LuMann makes fun of her for saying it and puts here fingers around her eyes to imitate glasses. Yeah...countess? "Mono" means one.
This is a monocle.
Kelly tells them that she's not going to Morocco because she's too sensitive and can't be around Ramona. Why is everyone so afraid of her?
Ramona, Sonja and Alex go to Ramona's plastic surgeon for a consult. I think Alex and Sonja thought they were just going to support Ramona but Ramona thinks that they could use a few touch-ups.
Alex is in a chair and the woman is taking off all of her makeup. She's pissed because normally clients come in without any makeup on. Alex says she goes through a bottle a week. Nice. You can probably push your finger into her cheek and it will go through a few layers of foundation.
Alex has a gross, bleeding zit now and the woman is scraping her face. Ew. We know why she has a zit - she wears pounds of makeup and says that she sometimes goes to sleep with makeup on. Gross.
It's another day and Jill is putting together a charity event about bullying. She tells Alex that she invited Ramona...is she going to be the poster child of who not to be as far as being a bully?
LuMann shows up and gives Ramona attitude...something stupid about fashion. Ramona says how she always wears David Meister (designer I guess) and LuMann points out that SHE knew who he was before Ramona. Apparently Ramona doesn't like it when her friends wear the same designer she wears and LuMann says that its "bitchy". Money can't buy you class, LuMann.
She then tells Ramona that none of the girls want to go to Morocco because Ramona is coming. She wants the trip to be positive. Alex points out that the only person that is being negative right now is her (LuMann). This is where Alex's "Thug in a Cocktail Dress" comment comes in.
Of course, Ramona brought a box of her own wine bottles. She was supposed to donate it to the auction but she pops open the box and pours herself. She's the only one drinking because apparently it is quite earlier in the day. She's yap, yap, yapping away.
Kelly decides that she IS going to go to Morocco.
Jill has a stepdaughter who has a facial birthmark. She's speaking to the charity attendees. While she's talking Ramona is basically selling her wine.
Jill's stepdaughter made short and sad speech about how she was bullied as a child. When it is done, people stand and clap, some hug her. We see Ramona out in the hallway with a bottle of wine. She's gone to the other room so she can bring her wine bottles to the table. She then asks the designer's daughter to clean up some empty glasses from the table.
Ohhhhh shit...the next three weeks they are in Morocco and it looks like everyone is fighting! Also, Sonja needs a tampon and Ramona thinks she's asking for high heels. I can't wait, especially after this snooze-fest episode.
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