16 & Pregnant: Jennifer & I Hate Josh (from 4/26)

Jennifer has a goofy looking boyfriend, Josh.

She's pregnant with twins and is upset that she may not have a baby shower. Her parents don't think she should have one.

Jennifer is pregnant because Josh finds it awkward to go and buy condoms. Seriously. That's his excuse. It's a little less awkward than watching two babies come out of your girlfriend's uterus. He should have thought of that.

They are naming the twins Noah and Joshua Jr. How can they do that? Won't Joshua Jr. always feel like the favorite because he was named after his father? Or maybe he'll feel like Noah stands out because he gets to have a different name? I don't like it.

Jennifer's parents don't want her to give the boys Joshua's last name because according to her father, that will give Josh more "jurisdiction" when it comes to them. Sure. So if they have to go to court to fight for custody the judge is going to say "Well...Josh gets them because they have the same last name as him."

Josh tells Jennifer that she's going to have to make a choice between him or her parents. Great job Josh.


Jennifer and her parents are on the porch having popsicles together.

Her dad wants to tell a riddle.

Dad: "Why did the dog sweat?"

Jennifer: "Because it had fur."

Dad: "Because it was a hot dog."

The fillers. Maybe they should just make the episode a half hour if they need to fill up space with this shit. I'm pissed at myself for even repeating it in this recap.


The ultrasound tech makes Jennifer feel worse about not having a shower. Josh's parents decide that they are going to throw a baby shower.  Jennifer's parents are probably not going to go because her dad thinks there will be a brawl if they do. Woo hoo!  That would liven up a boring baby shower. And trust me, this one looks like it needs some livening up.

Jennifer texts her mother to tell her how fun it is. She still calls her "mommy".

Evidently the shower was held at a location with no parking lot because Josh and Jennifer are driving through a field when they leave.

It is the first day of Jennifer's SOPHOMORE YEAR. Is she even 16 yet?  Holy shit. Sophomore year I was not having sex. I was more concerned with what I was going to wear to the football game on Friday night or which friend could sleep over.

And how old is Josh, did they say? He has his license so I think he's like a pedophile. 

He and Jennifer are out to dinner for their one year anniversary. Just a few days ago Jennifer was laughing at the thought of being engaged to Josh. So imagine the horror when he gets a plate sent over with another plate on top and inside is a ring.

He makes her stand up, gets on one knee and proposes.

She says "Of course I will." Great plan.

Josh waits in the car while Jennifer tells her mother - who just about shits the couch. She wants to talk to Josh so he comes in and she asks him to walk her through it. He just thought it was the right time. Yup. I guess he wasn't embarrassed to buy an engagement ring for a little girl but condoms - NO WAY!

Jennifer's mom is terrified to tell her husband the news. She doesn't say this but I can see it in her face. He's going to be PISSED! She says that she also cannot say congratulations to them. Was this really a surprise to Jennifer & Joshua?

Jennifer's dad confronts her in the morning. He says that Jennifer is 16 so I guess she's just an old sophomore.  He didn't freak out like I expected.

One of the reasons Jennifer said yes to Josh was that when she left the hospital with her twins she didn't want to say "He's my boyfriend" or "He's my baby daddy." Awesome reasons to get engaged. Awesome.

I'm bored. She needs to have the babies NOW.

Ok good. C-section time. Jennifer says that she saw Josh cut the cord - I thought that the dads couldn't cut the cord during a c-section? I had a vaginal birth so I have no idea.

Jennifer decides that the babies will have Josh's last name.

I just realized that Jennifer's mom's name is Jenny. WTF?

I hate Josh. While Jennifer is on the phone with her mother discussing Josh coming to their house when they leave the hospital, he's basically talking back to her (because Jenny's on speaker for the show). He needs to shut is ugly mouth.

Josh yells that they are HIS kids, not hers. I wonder who is paying for everything, they haven't talked about this yet.

They end up allowing Josh to come home with them. Jennifer cries the entire way home and can barely make it up the walkway to her house. How is she going to care for twins?

Of course, everyone stops by to be on tv see the babies on the first day home. I want to punch everyone in the head.

Josh heads to Dairy Queen in his hubcapless car to bitch about the situation to his friend. The next day he tells Jennifer that he won't come home while her parents are there. Smart. GREAT fiance she's got there. He also wears mom jeans. Gross.

Of course Jennifer decides that it is ok to bring the babies to Josh's house. While he's driving them, Jenny calls and Josh starts complaining. "Hang up please." "How disrespectful." He is so irritating.

When she gets off the phone he starts basically making fun of her that she still relies on her parents. HELLO? SHE'S 16 YEARS OLD! She's SUPPOSED to rely on her parents. Also, doesn't he live at home and rely on his parents???? I really want to punch him in his ugly face.

They argue and she says "Take me home". Josh's reply "Stupid ass bitch."

For some reason Jennifer keeps saying "Excuse you? Excuse you?"  The term is "excuse me."

He gets mad so he starts speeding. Yes, with the twins in the car. Then he starts putting his hand in Jennifer's face saying "Shut your mouth." He thinks he's going to drop her off and take the twins with him.  Didn't we all see this coming from the beginning?

He then pulls over on the side of the road in the rain and tells her to get out. She doesn't even have time to shut the door and he takes off...with the babies in the car.  This is not going to turn out well.

Josh comes back for some reason and she goes to try to get the babies out of the car - he manhandles her.

She calls the police. Josh takes the babies out of his car and places them on the side of the road.

Jenny shows up to save the day and Josh says "What are you looking at?" and then calls her a stupid bitch.  I'm so angry right now.

Luckily the police arrive and arrest Josh.

He's only in jail overnight and Jennifer is not pressing charges. At least she isn't answering his calls.  If she is with him during the wrap up special with Dr. Drew at the end of this season, I won't be surprised.

This was the saddest episode of 16 & Pregnant for me.

A lesson for anyone watching: Don't sleep with anyone who is embarrassed to buy condoms. It will NOT turn out well.  Also, when you still call your mother "mommy", you're too young to be having sex.