Teen Mom 2 Finale Special with Dr. Drew

In honor of the final episode I'm giving a shout out to my biggest fan - my friend Carrie Sinwelski. Love you!!

Of course, I love all of you that read my blog!!!

To the show!!

We just see them sitting on the couch and I'm already distracted by Chelsea's hair. I hope she has something to say about it.  It is actually making me nauseated it is so ugly.

First we have a look at what has happened this entire season. Makes me hate Jenelle all over again.

Quick rundown:

Leah is still quite orange with her super thick eyeliner.

Chelsea says she is still working on her GED but we all know about her hair.

Jenelle still isn't working.

Kailyn says Isaac is almost 30 lbs.

Leah is first up. They flashback to early in the season when she has the straight bangs, curly hair and ugly lip piercing. She wins as the most improved as far as looks despite her skin tone.

There is still no new information about Ali. She needs more tests but she's improving.

Dr. Drew hits a nerve when he asks where Leah's father is (she doesn't know). A recurring theme with all the teen moms (except Chelsea and Maci from season 1 - well, and Farrah maybe...but she doesn't call him dad so I get confused).

For the first time I'm watching the episode in real time so I can't fast forward through the commercials. I am very impatient right now.  I don't know how people do it without DVRs. Commercials are such a waste of time.

After the break Corey is joining Leah on the set.  Thankfully he is not wearing a too-tightly-curled-brim hat.  Maybe he read my blog. Or looked in a mirror. Or looked at his hat when he wasn't wearing it and said "What the fuck?"

Leah's orange-osity is much more noticeable sitting next to pale Corey.

They are talking about the issues with Ali and they are crying.

This is depressing. We need to move onto the trainwrecks of the show. I'm predicting that Kailyn is next, then Chelsea and then dum dum dummmmm Jenelle is the anchor.

Poop. I was wrong. Dr. Drew said that Chelsea is up next. He says "Everyone of course wants to know..." and I TOTALLY thought he was going to say "what's up with the blonde hair" but he said "what's going on with Adam." I guess we want to know that too. But PLEASE Dr. Drew, for the love of all that is bleached, ASK HER!


Chelsea is wearing an ugly shirt that has orange sleeves. For a second I thought she was wearing a tank top.

The flashback to Chelsea's storyline doesn't highlight Adam's doucheness as one would have thought. We do get to see the scene where the girls talk in bed with their 80s hair again.

She and Adam are BACK TOGETHER. Is this the dumbest girl on the planet? Adam is here, of course. Maybe they are back together just so he could be on TV for the finale special.

His douchey sideburns are so long and the brim on his hat isn't curled at all. There's a happy medium here, guys.

Adam isn't really "living" with Chelsea so he is still not paying rent. Douche.

Randalicious is here and he's put on a few pounds.  Of course, Adam and Chelsea switch places on the couch so that Randy isn't close to Adam.

Adam is disrespectful and swearing at Randy saying that he's talking out of his ass. I want Randy to jump up and punch him.

This is the worst relationship since Ike and Tina. Neither of them trust each other. They argue constantly. Adam yells at Chelsea for having feelings.  Chelsea says that she tries to not fight or cry around Aubree. Too bad all of it is recorded and broadcast all over the world.

There is no way that this relationship will work. No way.

Dr. Drew did not ask about the blonde hair.


Misery is up next. I mean Kailyn. A flashback full of frowns and misery.

She's crying after seeing Jo yell at her in the parking lot after the custody meeting. This is new. I don't remember her really crying at all during the season.

Kailyn has her own place and Jo doesn't know where she lives so he can't come by in a fit of rage. Good decision.

Oh man, goofy Jordan is here and this is what he looked like in the shot before the commercial. Perfect!

OH...MY...GOD.  Please tell me that this is just the lighting on the stage and that his sneakers are actually white.

Nope, they actually are flourescent green because Dr. Drew commented on it. They really match with his navy blue sweater and red collared shirt. They are almost as distracting as Chelsea's hair. And the laces are flourescent green too. They are scary.

Kailyn actually seems to have a decent head on her shoulders during this finale and she's on Mirena so she won't get pregnant with a giant baby.  Ok, I know I make fun of Goofy but he seems to be a nice guy.

Jo and Janet are joining Kailyn on stage now. Jo is not wearing ugly sneakers and he has a nice v-neck sweater on. Too bad he is an asshole.

Kailyn admits that she should have waited to date someone else. Jo says that he had dreams of being a family with Kailyn and that he still loves her. When Dr. Drew asks if he's still IN love with her he hesitiates before he says no. Awkward!!!

I think Jo is kind of trying to make himself look good on TV to make up for the swearing and yelling in the last episode.

Janet drops some gossip that even when Kailyn was living in the basement (and dating Jordan) that she would wake up in the morning and see Kailyn in Jo's bed. Lovely. I wonder if Jordan overheard this or if he's just sitting backstage scratching his head and blinding people with his sneakers.

I'm annoyed that Kailyn keeps saying to Janet that she knows she could have done things differently. She doesn't apologize. She's admitting she was wrong, but in a roundabout way. Just like Jo - he keeps saying that he's sorry "to a degree".

This segment is filled with fauxpologies. (That was the Urban Dictionary Word of the Day recently...and I'm happy I got to use it in a sentence.)

Janet and Kailyn hug and the audience claps.  Janet is still my favorite parent of the teen mom cast, with Barb's boyfriend Mike falling in a close second. Just because he is such a secondary character on the show and seems to know that Jenelle is a piece of shit like the rest of us.


Jenelle's turn and she seems to be wearing a weird flowery top with some 80s shoulders. I think she may have borrowed it from Barb. One good point - she seems to have cut off her dirty hemp necklace but maybe it is hiding under the 80s top.

Flashback of Jenelle's story! Full of yelling, swearing and sad shots of Jace.  Also the realization that my accent is somewhat similar to Barb's (me being from Massachusetts)...but I don't yell like she does and she's a little more NY/NJ.

Jenelle knows that Reefer was bringing her down now. She doesn't like to be alone, she doesn't feel loved. Hmm...I wonder if that is why she got pregnant? Someone to always love her? Except I don't know that Jace will love her when he grows up and sees these episodes. Poor kid.

Dr. Drew points out that Reefer was a criminal and homeless...what's not to love? Jenelle said that his sense of humor got her. I thought maybe it was because he wore dirty hemp necklaces like her and said corny quotes like "Yesterday's history, tomorrow's a mystery, today is a gift, that's why they call it the present." I mean, who WOULDN'T fall for that. It's like he's Shakespeare.

Jenelle knows that Reefer used her, but what she doesn't seem to know is that she needs to use some different shampoo. Her roots are really greasy looking.

Dr. Drew tells her that she can use this show to tell Reefer to fuck off if she wants. Go Dr. Drew!

Obviously this was filmed before Jenelle's viral video brawl because it hasn't been mentioned.

Barbara joins them after the commercial break and the first sentence she says is "Jenelle never expresses anything to me but disrespect." Oh what would we do without these two? Teen Mom 2 would not have been so exciting but seeing Jace makes me wish that this were a scripted fake TV show. No child should have to be in the middle of these two screaming at each other and no child should be subjected to Jenelle as a mother.

Dr. Drew puts Barbara on the spot and asks here to say three positive things about Jenelle. Holy shit, I'd fail that test even if it were multiple choice.

Barbara actually can't think of anything quickly. She says she's strong, she can be ambitious and can't think of a third. I cannot imagine being such an awful person that my own mother can't think of three positive things to say about me.

Dr. Drew asks if she is loveable and Barbara immediately says no. Well that's clear. No one can be loveable with a stinky hemp necklace.

Jenelle tells her mother that she wants her to show she cares about her and not yell at her. Barbara starts crying because all Jenelle does is disrespect her. Jenelle seems like she is a sociopath and she has no emotion or expression. She threatens to walk off the set.

This is the worst mother daughter relationship since Joan Crawford and Christina. I wonder if Barbara hates wire hangers too.


Time for the four moms to get together and ask each other questions. Please someone ask Chelsea about her hair!!!!!!!

So far Leah asks Chelsea how she deals with her relationship with Adam and her dad and Chelsea asks Leah how she deals with having twins, one of whom has a medical problem. (Except you KNOW Chelsea didn't use the word "whom").  These are stupid questions.

Somebody ask Chelsea what the fuck happened to her hair!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm giving up.

The babies are coming out now. Of course Aubree is wearing leopard and pink and Jace although older than a year is still drinking from a bottle. Isaac and the twins are adorable.

The Teen Mom 2 party is NOT over - next week there is an episode with unseen footage.

And then, on to the new season of 16 & Pregnant. Woo hoo!