Bethenny Ever After (from 4/11)

I totally forgot that I was mad at Bethenny for her reaction to her party last week. Hopefully she redeems herself tonight.

Ugh...the fucking skating. Boring. There is some kind of move called a "Death Spiral".  It didn't look deadly but who am I to talk...I can't even STAND on ice.

She's actually a lot better than I expected her to be.

B is very excited that today is the day that Jason gets new jeans. Jason didn't see any problem with his jeans until he sees the jeans she's picking out. He thinks he's been wearing like a burlap sack for all these years.

$245 for jeans???? Holy shit. I think paying $60 for jeans is too much. The first pair he tries on are definitely too tight. Aimless Small Potatoes does not approve of tight jeans on a man. Nope.

I guess they closed the store for B & Jason because a shot at the window shows a bunch of vulture paparazzi taking pictures.

Despite B's annoyance at Jason's family, she decides to have Thanksgiving dinner at their apartment.  Their table isn't big enough and Jason suggests they put a folding table next to the big one. B thinks that's tacky. LOL. I think every family event I've ever been to has had a folding table or two.

Both Julie and Gina suggest a folding table as well so I'm glad I'm not alone in my tackiness. Gina even suggests renting one. I wouldn't go that far.

The next big ordeal is trying to carry the gigantic glass table top out into the hallway. Luckily, some guy rings the doorbell and helps him.

While getting ready to go to Montreal to visit the Skinny Girl Margarita bottling plant, Julia checks her Google Alerts and finds something about B's mom bad mouthing her. Her mom thinks she's on Skating with the Stars for another reason than fun.

B and Jason get in the tub with Bryn to give her a bath. Bryn clutches B like she never wants to let go and I know that exact feeling when my son holds onto me. It really is the best feeling.

They are taking a private plane to Montreal and Jason is pumped. He wants to become a member of the Mile High Club...and it sounds like B is already a member.  I could never, ever do that. With my luck, while getting my "membership" I just know the plane would go down and I would survive but be naked from the waist down on a deserted island. All set.

They are walking around Montreal and it looks nothing like I remember it when I went in 1997. However, I was drunk most of the time and really didn't see it during the daytime.

They head to the bottling plant and have to wear plastic half-crocs, crossing guard vests, safety glasses and hair nets. I feel like we're watching the episode of Sesame Street or Mr. Rogers when they go to the crayon factory and show us how they are made. I LOVED those episodes.

I love that they do the Laverne & Shirley poses.

All-in-all a boring episode. Next week it looks like B is pissed at Julie for something. That looks interesting.

Of course now I have the theme song to Laverne & Shirley in my head.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
Sclemeel, schlemazel, hasenfeffer incorporated.
We're gonna do it!

Give us any chance, we'll take it.
Give us any rule, we'll break it.
We're gonna make our dreams come true.
Doin' it our way.

Nothin's gonna turn us back now,
Straight ahead and on the track now.
We're gonna make our dreams come true,
Doin' it our way.

There is nothing we won't try,
Never heard the word impossible.
This time there's no stopping us.
We're gonna do it.

On your mark, get set, and go now,
Got a dream and we just know now,
We're gonna make our dream come true.

And we'll do it our way, yes our way.
Make all our dreams come true,
And do it our way, yes our way,
Make all our dreams come true
For me and you.