Survivor: Redemption Island (from 4/13)

Matt is on Raw Sewage Island talking to his god again. Not sure why he isn't pissed at him for getting him sent back to this place AGAIN, but I don't pretend to understand this kind of thing.

Back at the camp, David is comparing Rob to a mobster because of the move from last week voting Matt out again.

Hairy Ralph is already trying to get in with the girls from Rob's alliance. He tells Ashley that he will vote for her to win over Rob at the end. Natalie is there so she hears this.

Rob is keeping the "us versus them" mentality and wants the tribes to hate each other but he's going to try to play nice so he gets their votes at the end. I really can't see how Rob is going to win. Why would someone let him get to the end with them? He already played this game!

Natalie told Rob what Ralph said to Ashley and that Ashley didn't want to tell him about it. Sounds like Rob is a little pissed about that and will be working on getting rid of Ashley after he gets rid of the other tribe. I don't know. This whole first part of the recap is too convoluted and he said, she said stuff.

Ok here we go. Crazy Phillip is wearing a dirty feather on his head at the immunity challenge.

When Jeff asks him if he collided with a bird, Phillip said that while meditating he asked for a sign and this feather came out of "thin air". He knows that it will bring luck to his alliance (the former Omitepe tribe).

The challenge involves digging, spitting and puzzles. Woo hoo! There are three rounds.

Everyone looks like my dog when he's trying to find a bone he buried last spring.

The first six to make it to the spitting round are Grant, Rob, Ralph, Mike, David and Julie.

These six have to suck water into their mouths, crawl under the trough of water and spit it out in their tube.  Julie is basically just spitting spit into hers, not water. She sucks.

Grant, Mike and David are in the final round with the puzzle.

Grant wins immunity. I love his dreads and his smile but last week's shot of his feet were so gross it ruined everything.

On the way back to camp Mike notices that the tribe flag has been moved so they think maybe there is a hidden immunity idol under it. They start digging but as soon as Rob and Phillip see them doing so, they run over to join in. Mike and David watch as the two dig for what is actually nothing.

Rob has some idol paranoia and pulls his alliance in to discuss who their vote will be for tonight.

Suddenly it looks like maybe Grant got his wisdom teeth pulled or something. I'm not sure why he's wrapped his head up with a buff. I can't believe I just called it a buff. It's a fucking bandana!

At tribal council, Super Secret Agent Phillip is still wearing his feather. Jeff teases him by saying that he knew one of his alliance members was going to win immunity prior to the challenge. Of course Phillip doesn't see this as a tease and answers seriously.  He says his great great grandfather who was a full blooded Cherokee came to him in a meditation and told him that was going to happen. He also said that his group will live long in Survivor lore.

The "others" say that they believe Phillip is on the bottom of the alliance. We find out that Phillip enjoys being a bottom...or...on the bottom because he can look up and see what is going on.

When Ralph says that if he's here tomorrow, he's going to keep pushing and trying and who knows, maybe he'll find a feather.

Phillip sounds pissed and says "It takes COURAGE and determination and to know when to hold your tongue to get a feather."

Ralph: "Oh."

Jeff ask Mike what he thinks of the feather and he says he thinks it is an insecurity thing and that he's struggling to find himself and doesn't really know who he is.

Phillip interrupts: "You're right. I got a college degree, became a special agent, working for three separate agencies. I served the United States army and had the second highest medal they give during peace time."

David: "Just give it up, you sound like a lunatic."  FINALLY someone says it.

All of the former Zapatera tribe vote for Phillip of course. However, one of them spells it "Philite". Did someone think his name was pronounced Phil-lit?

Mike is who is being sent to Raw Sewage Island with Matt.

Back at the camp, Rob tells Phillip that he's not at the bottom, he's at the top with him.  And suddenly, everyone is preparing to rob a bank in their sleep.

The next day Ralph tries to talk to the alliance but they are having none of it.

Today's challenge involves hanging from a pole for 20 minutes with your arms and legs, and then hanging only by the legs.

They can choose to skip the challenge and eat cheeseburgers which is what Phillip and Steve do. Everyone else is fighting for the immunity necklace.

Rob falls first. Everyone else makes it to the next round where they are hanging with just their legs. Julie falls next. Grant and then Ralph next.  David is against three of Rob's girls.

This looks so painful. I have cramps in my legs just from having my laptop on it at night never mind hanging upside down from a bamboo stick.

David falls, then Ashley, Natalie and Andrea wins. 

Ralph finds the net on the shore full of dead fish. They cook and eat it but Rob tells his people that they shouldn't eat the fish because they are dead. Grant goes over to have a piece and Rob calls him back like his little bitch.

At tribal council Phillip rambles again and says that there is for the first time in 22 seasons, a highly effective and beauteous and glorious operation in effect right now."

Jeff: "Which is what?"

Phillip: "It's called STEALTH!"

Rob: "R"

Grant: "Us"

They have a little cheer. This is new. And lame.

Phillip explains: "I am known as the specialist. My principle responsibilities: infiltrate and subplant (?) inceptions into the former Zaparra...Zapotera tribe. We have here Boston Rob, the mineralist. Principle responsibilities to develop strategies for challenges and develop strategic alliances that are impervious. There's Grant. The destroyer of aspirations, better known as the Assassin. Principle responsibilities to go out and compete, destroying any competitor. And I forgot to mention the three degrees who are highly effective, formidable, agile and have supreme abilities to focus their mind like they did today."

Phillip also brings up the effective "buddy system" that Rob put into place. Basically, none of them are alone at any time so they aren't vulnerable to an approach from someone from the other alliance. Julie comments that Rob has complete control and that it is cult-like.

David is next to go. It sounds ridiculous because Jeff says "Tenth person voted OUT of Survivor: Redemption Island - David."  But he's not voted OUT of Redemption Island, he's voted TO Redemption Island.