Teen Mom Season Finale: Worth Watching Just to See Chelsea's Hair in Previews for Next Week (from 3/29)

Leah is headed to the nail salon because she's getting married tomorrow.  Her sister Victoria is orange.

Time for the rehearsal! They are doing the rehersal at a church even though they are getting married at Coonskin Park. Leah's sporting the raccoon look again.

Leah's staying at her mother's house the night before the wedding and her orange sister is laying in bed with her while she talks on the phone with Corey.  They both have full makeup on and I feel the need to go wash my face and my pillowcases just looking at them.

I thought they were just hanging out to talk but Orange gets up to turn off the light. They are sleeping in full makeup! This is just gross. The sheets are going to be full of eyeliner and orange.

It is morning and Leah has no makeup on so she must have washed her face after the camera guys finished filming her cuddle with her orange sister.  Can I just say that I know she tried to match her nails to her wedding colors but they are really ugly.

Corey's mom is a hair stylist at a place called "Head Hunters". Perfect. She's getting some extensions in, curls and lots of hairspray. The pictures in US Weekly made Leah look really pretty but after she gets ready I really hate her makeup and her fake tan.  Maybe I should adjust the tint on my TV because Chelsea looks orange too.

The bridesmaids dresses are really pretty. I'm happily surprised. Well, technically I was happily surprised when US Weekly printed the pictures in last week's magazine.

The guys are getting dressed in a bathroom with their suits draped over the stall doors.

Corey's dad gives Corey a pocket knife that he carried with him during the Persian Gulf War. He also shows him a polaroid of him and Corey when he was about 3 or 4 years old. He tells Corey how he's so proud of him for stepping up and taking care of his girls and he's happy about the man he's become. I think Corey is almost crying under his sunglasses.

Leah gets dressed and she does look beautiful.

I'm nervous for them! I didn't have a big wedding because I did not want to stand in front of everyone like this.

Leah's mother looks like she's going to pass out from fear as she walks down the...dance floor.

Leah is waiting her turn to walk in and I think she's in some kind of sub zero refrigerator.

The twins are SO DAMN ADORABLE!!!

Corey cries as soon as he sees Leah walking down the dance floor. So sweet. These two redeem all of the other teen moms.

During the vows, Leah starts cracking up at the line "for richer or for poorer". Maybe she's imagining their non-mobile-mobile home.

When they kiss I think they almost break each other's noses. They are cute. One Teen Mom couple I'm proud of...as we move on to the others...

Chelsea hasn't heard from Adam for a few days. Both Chelsea and Aubree have colds and Chelsea's mom offers to make her soup. Instead, she's going home to get some diapers and have her dad bring her sushi.

Adam's SUV has been parked in her driveway and he hasn't picked it up. Randalicious is having it towed the next day.  Good.

Chelsea is picking out decorations for Aubree's birthday party and she wants to continue with the leopard print and pink theme. I hope she doesn't find any leopard print stuff.

Back at the house, Adam's vehicle is being towed. He was given fair warning by Randy. I love seeing people's cars get towed for some reason. Especially dicks like Adam.

It's Aubree's first birthday! I don't see any leopard print yet, just pink. Chelsea, her mom and sister discuss Adam and Chelsea actually says that she knows there is something wrong with her because she keeps going back to him. Acknowledging it is the first step.

Oh the cake, paper plates and the balloons have some leopard print.

Chelsea is in the bathroom getting ready with Megan and another friend. Not only is Chelsea wearing leopard print, the shower curtain is leopard print.  The two friends look like they are dressed up for an 80's Halloween party. I really don't get this theme at all.

For some reason Adam is texting Chelsea's mother. He's not welcome at the party but he wants to get Aubree tomorrow.

The party is over and Adam is suddenly at the house. He opens the garage door and starts throwing carriages across the garage. He is looking for his motor.  He gets in the house and asks where his car and motor are. Chelsea tells him that his car was towed and Adam says "Why?"

I wish there was something heavy and leopard print that would just fall from the sky and land on him right now. Chelsea won't call her dad for him to ask where his things are and Adam calls her a fucking bitch.  They lock the door so he can't get back in. Outside he's swearing up a storm calling Chelsea a bitch.

Chelsea is nervous about it and she calls Randy to let him know what is going on. She calls him and says "Dad, guess what?!" It's like she's going to tell him that she won the lottery or invented a machine that turns everything into pink leopard print.  Who starts a phone call like that when it involves something that may end up needing a 911 call?

Chelsea and her 80s dressed friends are sitting in her bed under the blanket talking. I don't understand this. This is her own house, why aren't they hanging out in the living room? The only reason you and your friends hang out in the bedroom is when you live with your parents. Maybe I'm just getting old.

Kailyn hasn't talked to Jo in a while and she's going to pick up Isaac while he's home. It looks like things might be ok with them and their custody agreement. There was no swearing or door slamming.

For some reason Kailyn feels bad about getting the custody agreement in writing simply because he was nice to her. She is even dumber than I thought. At least she has Suzi who is encouraging her.

While Kailyn is in the kitchen leaving Isaac unattended. He's eating dog food. Probably better for him than all the Gatorade or juice she gives him.

Kailyn goes out to eat with Jordan who pretends he knows Spanish and thinks he's a comedian all of the sudden. He's not funny at all so he can't make Kailyn laugh. I don't know what could make her laugh. She's too miserable.

Blah blah blah it is mediation day for Kailyn and Jo. No smiles from anyone so far. Not that it is a fun day for them, but holy crap these people make me tired.

Jo dressed up a bit for the mediation but Kailyn is in jeans.  Jo actually smiles and I almost passed out.

Cameras aren't allowed in the mediation room so luckily Kailyn and Jo recap it for us afterwards.  Jo wants a small change to their agreement and since Kailyn doesn't agree Jo says that they will have to see a judge about it because she's mentally ill.

While handing off Isaac to Jo, Kailyn tells Isaac "Your dad's a *beep*" and I can't tell what she says. Jo says "Your mom's a bitch." I truly hope that these kids use their Teen Mom income towards therapy for their children.

They argue all the way out to the car. Jo says "You think you're better than me? You ain't better than nobody. You're a piece of shit so shut the fuck up." Please someone cover Isaac's ears.  I'm sad at the end of this story.

Jace is crying and I think it is because Jenelle is home. She goes outside and hides around the corner to call Reefer because she knows Barbara would be pissed if she knew she was calling him.

Reefer has been forbidden to stay at his friend Mike's parents' beach house where he was staying with Jenelle previously - but...he's staying there anyway. I had a feeling that this beach house would be the reason they get arrested for breaking and entering. Sure enough, Jenelle goes there to visit and when she wakes up at 2am, Reefer was gone and the cops were banging at the door.

Jenelle is arrested for breaking and entering and possession of marijuana. The police found Reefer down the street and arrested him as well. Good to know that he just took off on Jenelle and left her there alone.

It is 6am and Jenelle is calling Barbara to tell her that she's in jail. Barbara's response is a calm "What are you doing there?" as if Jenelle just told her "I'm down at the mall."

Jenelle tells Barbara that she is done with Reefer and she wants to come home. Poor little Jace. Little does he know that within the next year his mom will be arrested again for fighting.

Jenelle spends the night in jail and posts her own bond. Her friend picks her up. Jenelle tells her the story and supposedly Reefer was just going to park Jenelle's car elsewhere and she fell asleep - that's why he wasn't with her when the cops came.

The cops brought her to the place where Jenelle's car was supposed to be (Reefer's friend's house) and the cops find him in there drinking and snorting coke.  Reefer got into the backseat of the cop car and says "I'm sorry. I love you." Thank goodness Jenelle seems to realize that he's bad news.  But...we all know that he's not the end of her problems.

Jenelle heads off to school and Reefer calls her to ask if she's going to get him out of there. He doesn't know why she wants him to sit in jail and think about it. He says he loves her and she doesn't say it back. A whole new Jenelle today.

Later Barbara gets home with Jace and Jenelle looks like she still hasn't showered yet.  What the fuck? You were in jail last night you dirty bitch!

She explains what happens with Barbara and they both yell at each other again in front of Jace.

Ok I know why they made this episode an hour and a half long - there is a commercial every 5 minutes.

Jenelle calls the credit card company to see what she owes from what she stole from her mother. Almost $800.  She tells Barbara that she's going to pay her back, stay in school and try to stay on the right path. 

Poor Barbara looks like she's aged about 20 years just this season of Teen Mom. 

She cries and says that she doesn't think Jenelle loves her and that she doesn't care. I agree with her. But Jenelle goes and gives her a hug.

Reefer calls Jenelle again and asks if she is going to bail him out. She says no and he asks if they are still together. She says that she doesn't know and that he has to change.

However, the more she thinks about it, she wonders if she's being too hard on him. Ugh. She talks to Barbara's boyfriend Mike about it. Because she's been in a relationship with Reefer for a whole five months straight it is hard to not be with him.

Mike, the voice of reason, tells Jenelle that she needs to drop everything and hang out with her kid. Mike is my favorite guy on the show.

But of course, Jenelle misses Reefer after TWO DAYS of him being in jail so she is going to bail him out. She has to keep it a secret from her mother. Doesn't she know Barbara finds out everything?

Jenelle goes to her friend Amber's house where there is a mattress in the lawn. C-L-A-S-S-Y.

Her plan is that she's not going to be with Reefer until he finds his own place and a job. She's giving him two weeks to change. Reefer's bail is $2,000 and the bondswoman can do it for $200 with a cosigner who is at least 21 years old.  Luckily, Amber's boyfriend is there and he says he'll do it. Idiot.

Does it not look like Jenelle has a giant lump on her forehead in this scene? Also, I think she still hasn't showered. 

NEXT WEEK on the finale special...breaking news:

 Chelsea is incognito.

What...the...fuck?